Forums > Living in Kunming > How does one meet nice Chinese women? Being the only woman in this discussion is not very easy, but since this discussion seems imbalanced I'd like to share my opinion.
Someone said:
"I find that Western women tend to want an ideal of a man — the perfect man — who has the right line and does the right things. If I approach a Western woman, I am supposed to speak just the right lines, be funny, say just the right jokes, stand the right way, pose the right way, and have just that right sentence or word. But Chinese women, if I am just friendly and natural, they will talk to me. That is the main difference to me."
I was in the States just for holiday, so I can only talk about "approaching European girls", but this is the most stupid thing I heard so far. Have you spoken to one of your female friends about it? Im pretty sure, they could have given you some advice for the next date. It's just another way of saying that you dont know how to approach girls and are very insecure. The difference with Chinese girls, the ones without rich laowai experience, is that they think this (what seems weird to Westeners) behaviour is typically foreign. Some of them also dont bother too much, as the foreigner can provide them with other things (not meant in a negative sense).
I have a couple of very good friends who came to China for job reasons or for studying. They all have Chinese girlfriends/wives now and Im very happy for them as they never had a real relationship back home since I can remember.
So, where did my friends find their girlfriends/wives?
1. at University in China and back home
2. Language exchange in China and back home
3. When travelling around China
4. at work (the girl used to be his translator)
For me a looser laowai is someone who comes to China, finds a Chinese girlfriend, makes her pregnant and then forces her to have an abortion, because he already has a family back home or doesnt want to take responsibilty. Then these guys go onto the next Chinese girl and it starts all over again. Some of them are even so kind to pay for the medical expenses.
And finally, why me and my girlfriends are not attracted to Chinese men. We all had Chinese boyfriends though and I only speak from our experience. In terms of physical attraction, most Chinese men have the body figure of an adolescent back home. But, look is only one part of attractiveness. In terms of character and personality, there are three groups of Chinese men. One is submissive, bossy/imperious and the thrid group is "I want a foreign girlfriend trophy". The second and third groups are the worst. We experienced things like "Can you put on some sunblocker?! I want you to stay white", 'I want sex now' ' I dont want to' ' I dont care, I want. You are my girlfriend, so it's your duty to make me happy', 'I want to get married next year and I want to have a son', 'I dont care if you want to leave me, I wont let you leave me. I know your passport number and I have proof that you worked illegaly in China". And so on. When you break up, they will stalk you, call your friends, show up at your house and workplace, call you so often that you need to change your number and your email address. Two of my friends went back home, because of them. Some of the Chinese guys even had degrees from Western universities.
Laos extradites drug suspects to Yunnan
Posted by@HFCAMPO: I dont take drugs or smoke and never did. Back home I worked for an institution that takes care of drug addicts.
Laos extradites drug suspects to Yunnan
Posted by@faraday: Now I see your point about khat. These sort of political decisions happen quite a lot. You never know if they were and to what extend they were influenced by the lobby.
Comming back to the point of discussion. I just believe, that no one has the right to decide who should live and who should be put to death. Especially supporting it by saying everyone should serve a purpose. That's faschist logic. I personnally dont think it's appropriate to say things like that neither in a forum nor in real life whether it's a joke or meant serious.
Laos extradites drug suspects to Yunnan
Posted by@faraday: Khat is not harmless. There are a couple of studies from various organizations and from different countries that prove the opposite of what you just said.
And for HFCAMPO: Coming from a country without death penalty and where death penalty is also considered murder, your attitude makes me sick. But hey, only developing countries like Europe, Russia, Ruanda, Ukraine and so on banned the death penalty.
Well at least advanced countries like the States, Yemen, China and North Korea still keep it. And because Europe is not exporting lethal injections to the States anymore, you are even considering using the electric chair again and think it's ok to use some lethal injections without prior testing? As a convict has no right to get a painless death. C'mon even every vet from the countryside can put a dog to sleep...
And how do you define purpose? What about the obese, the sick, the disabled, the old, the homeless? The street children in East Europe and Russia sniffing glue and other things to life on the streets. People esp. women trapped in human trafficking are forced to take drugs to stop them from running away. Ampethamines and crystal meth were given to American, British, German and Japanese soldiers so that they can fight much longer and care less about the risks.
I suggest for next time, just think before you write something. It gets into this mmteacher kind of attitude.
Laos extradites drug suspects to Yunnan
Posted by@HFCAMPO:
As I said before. You have to be very careful when you use sentence like "Get rid of the demand - just execute all drug users since they serve no purpose in any society."
This statement is inhuman! In my country the freedom of speech ends where human dignity is violated! Millions of people were killed because people said they dont serve any purpose. Shame on you, seriously!
Laos extradites drug suspects to Yunnan
Posted by@HFCAMPO: Alcohol and cigarettes are also drugs.
'they serve no purpose in any society' you have to be very careful when you say somehting like that. It's very similar to what some people said between 1933 and 1945 in Germany about certain groups in society!