Tenwest Mandarin School

User profile: TheSwedishGuy

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  • RegisteredMarch 11, 2008
  • RegionChina
  • VerifiedNo
  • RegisteredMarch 11, 2008

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Forums > Living in Kunming > Chinese family wants do adopt my son

Nope, she still has to wait for three years before she is a "real" Swedish citizen. SFI is free but you can't get any funding during your SFI studies anymore, it used to be a bit more relaxed before if you were married and had children with a Swedish citizen, not anymore though.

Her University diploma is one step lower than BA (kandidat) and is only recognized in Australia, Great Britain etc. Don't know what it's called in English.

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Forums > Living in Kunming > Chinese family wants do adopt my son

Thanks JJ, actually my advice above was mostly based on biased frustration at the time. Internet is a wonderful, somewhat anonymous way to let some of the preasure out.

I do beleive a Chinese and "western" marriage can end up in a perfect and long lasting one. I guess you need some important ingredients first such as mutual respect, trust etc. some of which, it seems, we are lacking at the moment. The one advice I will take to heart (this might be somewhat Swenglish) is this one "The only real responsibility, is the one we have to our children." and indeed, my sons well being has to go first at all times.

AnnAurora: We have actually lived in Sweden for more than a year, it was way to hard for us to live there. Hard to get a job since I have mostly done academic work in the past. For her, you can't get a job in Sweden unless you learn Swedish. Actually way more rasism in Sweden too. So my wife is kind of doomed to study Swedish for a few years before she can, hopefully, get a green card, thus not having to pay the new tuition fee all non-European Union students have to pay starting from this year. Can't really pay 9-13.5 wan a year on a normal Swedish salary either. Another problem being her uni diploma. It's not recognized by Swedish authorities, thus redusing her effectively to a the status of "high school graduate" which kind of sucks after a few years at Yunnan Normal.

Anyway guys, just needed to let out some steam, I really appreciate every advice you gave me!

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Forums > Living in Kunming > Chinese family wants do adopt my son

Thanks for stating the obvious guys (not being sarcastic here) really, kind of makes me realize a few things. The last comment by Daliluver made me laugh, it is so much like the shit I am already taking everyday.

Tonyaod, the only reason I had my child in Sweden was just to fuck them over if we would fight about custody in the future. My son is a Swedish citizen, no one in my wifes family has workcertificates, they are just slacking of back home talking about their next meal and playing Majiang all day. Which means I have the legal right to full custody. No way I am signing any papers that would make any in in her family a legal guardian or what ever. Actually (we are not registered as a married couple in China and my son has no papers showing that he is my wifes son.) No way I am changing my future plans for a twisted idea that I am supposed to provide for the whole family... I mean, sure, I can stick some money to her parents when they are old and might even be willing to let them stay with me in Sweden but fuck... apparently my wifes uncle called us 堕落 the other day. Nice word, will use it in the future, but I was about to burst and fucking smash the guy straight into the wall. I just pretended I didn't understand and made her family lose even more face through misguided comments the whole evening instead.

I have studied Chinese and the Chinese culture for 6 years but the shit you face everyday when you live in a nongmin-family... should really be on the first page of any beginners textbook. At least when I start teaching Chinese at uni in the future. One advice to anyone reading this, don't fucking get married to a Chinese girl, sure, they are built for pleasure, but used they turn into something more like a butplugg with thorns. Just a warning...

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Forums > Living in Kunming > Chinese family wants do adopt my son

The other thing is that my wife wants to get a divorce if I don't agree to this bullshit... she says that she can't have a life if we have a kid in it all the time... and I am like "What the fuck?" since we both decided to have a kid... and I want to be a part of my sons life as much as possible. He is the only thing I care about. When I am around her family they don't even let me play with my son, always taking him away from me and think I am selfish that I want to spend time with him. They do get angry if I take him out alone just to have some nice alone time with him... getting really annoyed and I've started to have "bad-China-days" everyday recently.

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Forums > Living in Kunming > Chinese family wants do adopt my son

Is this just weird or is it a Chinese thing?

My Chinese family feels that I need to work instead of taking care of my son so they wish to adopt him so I can go back to my country together with my Chinese wife and work for 4-5 years so I can come back and give them some mianzi and then take care of my son... Is it just me or are all fucking Chinese people retarded and crazy?

First of all, would it even be possible from a legal stand point? My son is a Swedish citizen and so am I. My wife is a Chinese citizen.

Second, what the fuck?

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I have lived in Kunming for 4 years but have never been to the Tiger Leaping Gorge, it sucks and if they are working on the road and shit, I want to do it as soon as I get back to Yunnan again in March. You guys mentioned a night bus to Shangri-La, which bus station does it start from?

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