What are the women in heterosexual relations supposed to do?

By the way one example of how the friend-zone first approach to dating in China, is to successfully ask a girl out on a date, only to have her call you a few moments before the date time to ask you if she can take "a friend" with her. I don't have fingers in my hand or feet to count how many times this has happened to me.

@Spartans: I misunderstood your references to the 'friend role', now I think I've got it. Not uncommon in China or in many other countries.

Once I was asked by a Chinese girl friend (I'm female) if I want to go with her to some new bar she wanted to check out. It turned out that she was meeting a foreigner for a date that night and wanted me to act as a chaperone. I don't know who was more surprised - me or the poor dude. Afterwards she asked me what I thought about him and her decision whether to date him again or no was partially based on my opinion.
Also, once I got introduced to a Chinese man and he expected that I will bring a friend on our first date. He was really surprised when I showed up alone.
Anyway, bringing a friend to check out a guy you're dating seems like a common practise in China.

@Spartans, it seems like the only thing you can do is to be nice to her friend and you might get a second date with her only.

@Serrure, unfortunately what ends up happening on the second and even third dates is the opposite; they bring even more friends. That is why I vowed not to go on "dates" with more than one person ever again.

My answer on the phone now is: -Oh you want to bring a friend ? You know what, I don't know your friend and I think you can enjoy her company today. If and when you want to meet me alone you can call me back and we can go out, I'll be waiting for your invitation.

now wer are getting to the heart of the matter. the op hasn't worked out the china dating thing yet and it seems to have litle to really do with the orignianal topic. points to note. 1/western guys have a bad reputation. 2/ chaperone is normal here. 3/ might not be seen as demure to meet a guy alone the first few times (consider #1 and remember face). 4/ expressing intentioins too early in a relationship is a death blow. try using the 'L' word back home to early and see a girl run a mile.

So basically, that guy blames Chinese guys and the local dating system because he's unable to get any Chinese girl.

"Basically", I bet I get laid in 6 months more than that this guy above got in 6 years. I'm tall, strong and I get compliments almost daily about how handsome I am, from women, children and even guys, and not just in China. I have even worked as an actor for CCTV several times and do modeling.

I wrote this as a way to try get more enlightened about the dating behavior in China, but now it seems that this has turned into personal attacks, well, two can play this game, as unfortunately there are a lot of internet warriors around who hide behind keyboards because they cannot utter some of the things they say here to man's face .

Going back to the subject, the more you are engaged in a complex activity the more you get to experience all sorts of outcomes. Chaperones are common but it doesn't mean you have to engage in them.

@Dazzer: I do not tarnish the reputation of western men because I am always honest and straightforward when I communicate my intentions to women, unlike most men, which probably includes yourself, I don't manipulate them. They might reject me, but they know my intentions beforehand, and this includes long term romantic relationships.

What you said about using "the L world" and see a girl running a mile is a crack of bull, have you even tried this, or are you just assuming? ?

The appropriateness and acceptability of the L word obviously depends on the particular unique characteristics of the situation and the individuals involved.

I agree with Alien and because I don't do destructive criticism, like some of the people here, I'll also leave a suggestion. To stop manipulating women or getting manipulated by them, I suggest reading Alan Roger Currie's {Mode One "Let the Women Know What You Are Really Thinking"}.