Something that's been irking my...no offense to anyone

Posted in: Forums > Living in Kunming • 14 posts • Newest

• • Tonyaod
    March 9, 2010
    181 posts
  • What's with the recent slew of tacky want ads? I've been keeping my mouth shut out of respect for their rights to post such ads but I just can't stand it anymore.

    No offense to anyone, wanting to hook up with some one to pass a lonely night is fine, we're all human and I'm no prude. But is it really necessary to blare SEX all over your ad? Is it necessary to let it be known to the WHOLE expat community that you are basically extremely horny and looking for someone to scratch your itch for the night and then blow them off in the morning?

    I guess I'm just tired of Chinese friends constantly asking me why are foreign guys so open and always only after one thing and don't care about the girls they are with...sigh.

    Anyway, I know I'm not being objective here and its something that's just been bothering me and needed to rant about it.

    Thanks for listening.

• • Philistine
    March 9, 2010
    4 posts
  • Good point, Tony!

    I am extremely agree with you! I am so tired of those "Learning Chinese" "Private Tutors" ads. I feel like it is kinda unfair for those featured advertisers who paid a lot of money while those unpaid ads appear everyday on the CLSSIFIEDS and FORUM sections and even get better promotion effects.

    Advertisers! Please DO NOT flood the forum with duplicated information.

    I think the admins might consider to filter some of those ads, making this forum a more effecient and fairer one.

    I always appreciate the convenience that GoKunming brings me, but I hope it is not a place for unlimited ads, but a place to exchange USEFUL information.

• • nnoble
    March 9, 2010
    178 posts
  • If Chinese friends are mentioning this then it's counter to accepted behavior and those causing the offense through use of explicit and coarse language should at least know.

    Just in the last few days a friend and colleague caused great offense by not being aware and following etiquette at a meal. The behavior displayed caused me to wince and would have been deemed rude at a family table at home. And here is the problem, one westerner's unacceptable behavior is quite often then attributed to all westerners.

    A large number of Chinese may assume this is normal and accepted behavior at home when in fact bad manners can be recognized as such the world over by young and old alike. It works both ways: Kunming drivers habits would be recognized as bad the world over but then at least they're on home ground.

• • JJ and Janice
    March 9, 2010
    253 posts
  • As for those poor suls who have to advertise for a relationship - - perhaps we should just extend sympathy!!

    Does anyone really answer ads from losers looking for "something"??

    In the U.S. these things are/would be fertile ground for sex offenders.

    Again, just my opinion.

• • Kiwi3
    March 9, 2010
    61 posts
  • Erm...why are some of you generalising that it is only westerners doing it? There was one funny one a couple of days ago where a Chinese guy was looking for western women, in fact quite a few tacky ones by locals looking for friends. Regardless of who is posting them they are more amusing than anything else.

• • hunter899
    March 10, 2010
    1 post
  • rofl
    and please let me laugh again, if it's not hurting, you sensitive puppies
    why you don't just go to complain to your mommies

    and please let me know what you are doing here if it's better in us or wherever,
    nobody force you to be here
    nobody force you to come here
    if you can't put up with that small ... my god
    maybe we should open a special puppies complaining hotline for you guys, that sounds promising lol

• • JJ and Janice
    March 10, 2010
    253 posts
  • WOW!! A "...special puppies complaining hotline ..."
    What a Great Idea.
    Are you going to organize one???

• • Tonyaod
    March 10, 2010
    181 posts
  • Dude, hunter...what are you talking about? Do you even comprehend what is being discussed here or are you too busy laughing at things you clearly don't understand.

    No one said anything about the US being better, or "whatever" for that matter. I have no idea what you are referencing to with "if you can't put up with that small". Small what? or do you mean smell. In that case, what smell are you referring to?

    I suggest that you put down the bong pipe, then MAYBE, you can understand what is being discussed here.

    Or better yet, once you're sobered up, you can get started on that special puppies complaining hot line idea of yours and perhaps finally make a lasting contribution to the expat community here in Kunming.

    Just a thought.

• • hetszunyu
    March 11, 2010
    11 posts
  • Shit I haven't seen these, they have to be really entertaining :) I only saw the chick discussing her new vibrator on the forum, that was epic :D

• • LuJingLin
    March 11, 2010
    28 posts
  • I think people need to separate their reactions to this a little bit. There is a difference between looking down on looking for play and not wanting that search to happen on this website. From what I see it seems like most people simply look down on foreign men and chinese women getting together casually. To that I say who cares? White men have earned a reputation (both unfairly through entertainment and fairly through real example) for being overly interested in sex and vice versa the stereotype of chiense women looking for money or an exotic lover. Both foreigners and chinese have their opinions about this but the fact is every case is different and I think its the judgmental impulse of gossiping chickens to have to create an outcry over it.

    As for whether this is the appropriate forum for such posts, I'm not really sure but that seems like the more interesting topic to discuss of what Tonyaod's brought up. Honestly it doesn't bother me, in fact many of those are a huge source of entertainment and nothing more in my mind, but I don't feel strongly one way or another.

• • barekarma
    March 11, 2010
    11 posts
  • I have just reviewed the forums to see what Tonyaod could mean by "tacky ads". I accept the ones from Westerns are quite direct, but I had to "read between the lines" for many that came from from local Chinese to decide if they were sex ads or not. Please remember that those Chinese writing in English are nearly all students, and the addtional meanings that Tonyaod, and others, may put to them may be unintended. For example, I contacted a Chinese Language partner ad that I am sure Tonyoad would say was a tacky sex ad. The girl was horrified to discover how her ad. could be interpreted. All she wanted was to practice English in a social context to improve chances in her ILTS exam. Neither her

    English/Chinese text books, nor her teachers, had even suggested that there could be double meanings. If the situation was "out-of- control", then I am sure that the Go-Kunming team would block that, as they have on other issues. They even give reasons, unlike the Great Wall. As for Westerns, a lot in Kunming do not have English as their first language, so please make allowence there too. I know that when I translate perfectly ordinary English into Hanzi, I have raised a lot of smilles with Chinese friends, as I have written something that has a totally different meaning locally. For example, my text book stressed that I should call a waitress "Xiao Jie" and I did for a very long time, until a chinese friend explained what that means in Kunming. Like my chinese language parnter, I, too, was horrified. Maybe some allowences need to be made before judgement is made.

• • Tonyaod
    March 11, 2010
    181 posts
  • Finally some thoughtful response to the point I was making.

    As I have stated, I wasn't blasting anyone in particular and was only stating my opinion. In no way was I attacking nor denying their right to make such posts.

    I have no problem with looking for a hook up, but rather, with the wording in the ads. I guess I look at like I'm dining at a fancy restaurant enjoying my meal and the guy next to me is chewing with his mouth open, taking on his phone loudly and scratching his ass at the same time. Bad etiquette? Yes. Affect my enjoyment of the meal? Yes. Do I have the right to have management ask the guy to leave? No.

    I was just expressing my anguish at being visually assaulted by the tacky ads, but I know that is just a matter of my own personal taste. I wasn't advocating anything to be done about it, just throwing it out there that maybe guys should be more classy in how they approach the subject here in the forum.

    Case in point:
    "Hi, im looking for a badgirl to have night time fun with.
    Im a 26 year old white guy from England."

    "hi,woman!
    i am a very strong chinese man,i am open mind and very fun.i am interested in sex,if you are too,welcome to contact with me!"

    On hindsight, perhaps I was being too sensitive about the issue.

• • LuJingLin
    March 11, 2010
    28 posts
  • No I see that, good restuarant comparison.

• • laotou
    March 12, 2010
    620 posts
  • I would venture that tacky ads tend to be more prolific in the dating section and the more elegant ads in the friends and possibly language or activity partner sections. And speaking of restaurants - any recs on good French or Japanese (I've heard NE Kunming has credible Italian).

• The Old Theatre Inn
• Lost Garden Guesthouse & Restaurant
• Chicago Coffee
• Kunming Mei's Mandarin School
• As You Like
• Keats School
• Moondog
• GoKunming
• YMCA Club 1933
• Slice of Heaven
• Kingsway Tented Resorts
• Bakery 88
• Camel Bar
• The Mask
• Kunming College of Eastern Language and Culture
• My Favor Restaurant
• Chapter One
• Wonders Of Yunnan Travel
• O'Reilly's Irish Pub
• Salvador's Coffee House
• Wangtianshu Restaurant & Deli
• Tenwest Mandarin School
• Cacao Mexican Restaurant
• Flying Tigers Restaurant
• Kunming Yu-Cong Enterprise Management Company
• Huiying Dental Clinic