Ritta,

I disagree. And i am foreigner. Most of my friends in Kunming are Yunnanese. Most local people don't try to know the foreigners who live near them, and they don't treat the foreigners who live around them in a polite way. That doesn't mean local people are bad, it means that they don't know how to express themselves in a way that most people in the world can receive as warm or comfortable.

Of course, many Yunnan people also don't feel that Kunming locals are very nice, but that is not exactly my experience, because I have met lots of nice people here. My experience is that the current customs of staring, calling people laowai, not getting to know people, asking them the same things over and over, acting distant, and also some subtle xenophobic behaviors, are not comfortable for almost anyone.

I admit that I didn't read the whole thread. I respect the point being made, but I think the lack of careful wording in the OP was just asking for responses like Misfit's. I am not Chinese, but I am totally opposed to any anti-Chinese comments. Any insinuation that any cultural group could lack humanity is really insulting. Use more specific( or less divisive) language to get your point across.

At the same time, the reply that Misfit and many others often give "but look, the same thing happens elsewhere" is all too common and really lame. People not helping other people is indefensible. Period. 2 wrongs don't make a right.

There is obviously a problem in Kunming and other cities, where people here are super individualistic in public-or as Laotou put it, many people only feel responsibility to their families. The claim of lawsuits is somewhat bogus, for reasons that I won't go into here. Further, if you can't help, why stand and watch?

I do think that many people across China would be more willing to help a hurt foreigner, and why that is so is worth discussing.

On an optimistic note, I have seen what I think is an increase of local people helping local strangers who have been hurt in the street, and I have been really impressed by that.

@Ritta,

It is mixed. Tomman says it is all friendly, but I think that it is not all friendly. Some of it is. But, actually, it seems that friendliness is the wrong way to measure this kind of thing. There are other things, like consideration, empathy (the golden rule), and sincerity that are often lacking among people who mean no harm. That might be what bothered your friend.

I also disagree with liumingke, I think foreigners adapt to it in waves-after some months it is not so bothersome, some months later it is bothersome again.

My own reply is that, generally speaking, most people in Kunming go too far with staring at "laowai". They stare too much. Most don't even smile when they do it, but the point is-that they wouldn't like to be stared at that way, and they should be able to predict that it is a problem that laowai faces everyday. But they either don't get this, or don't care.

About practicing English, it is often fine or harmless, but sometimes it feels cold to make "friends" with people who don't want to know you deeply. Basically, most people don't want to be close friends with a foreigner. At least not based on having something in common.

Most want to talk to them out of curiosity. Again, the golden rule. It would be good to stop and think if someone asked you the same things all the time, by people that you will never see again, would that bother you? Yes, it would.

Others want to practice their English, and that is fine if that's all it is and they say so. But, it is insulting when they say "I want to make a friend in order to practice my English". Others want to look cool, to gain face in their community by being seen with a laowai-it appears that they have connections overseas.

I have met some of the sweetest people in the world in Kunming, but lets not pretend that most of the current customs for interacting with foreigners are going to be considered inviting and warm, (unless one is simply a traveler on holiday, and therefore not looking for acceptance).

@ Needles, yes people stare, but usually the staring isn't really the problem, for reasons stated above by others . There are much more annoying things that you should prepare yourself for.

Many people will either proclaim "laowai" as you pass by-loud enough to hear and out of context of any reasonable use of the word. This gets old fast, and may even be done by people in your building complex or on your street who have already seen you multiple times. Far worse though is that people commonly heckle visible minorities (white people, black people etc, probably includes you) with what is known as the "hello joke". Someone will shout "hello" or "good morning" from a distance, using an intentionally strange tone.

They usually do this when with others, sometimes a small group, and then they crack up laughing while moving away from you. The crucial point is that if you try to address them, confront them, or reply to them-even in the friendliest of ways- they will either run away, deny that they said anything, or imply that you might as well move along. I say this is crucial, because it is this silencing effect-you are not supposed to speak back to them-that really qualifies it as harassment and separates it from just rowdy, harmless, behavior.

And it annoys the piss out of me. All in all, you will get used to most of this, and block most of it out. But if you are like me, on bad days it will slip through your defenses and bother you. I think this is because it is compounded by the fairly inconsiderate public behavior and the de facto nationalism that abounds here.

I am sure some dreamer will try to excuse or defend what I outlined above, erroneously thinking they are somehow on the side of "cultural" sensitivity or some such thing. Or maybe some tough guy will deliver some nice bar stool wisdom along the lines of "love it or leave it". This is, after all, an open forum.

Before I started this thread, I used the "search" function to check older thread about dentists in Kunming. Huiying is listed there, and and a few other places are mentioned, but their names, address, phone numbers omitted.

So to recap, thanks, but can anyone recommend a place besides huiying, and give more than a bus # ?( I don't ride the bus and don't want to spend a whole afternoon finding the place with such vague directions). An intersection, name, etc. would be great.

Also I am not looking for a foreigner friendly place, or a Dentist who speaks English. Thanks.