What's wrong with my jokes?

Is it because the Germans have no sense of humour?

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. They're amazingly efficient and not very entertaining.

Actually I was aware of the Germans from an early age. Nan used to tell me how Granddad killed a couple while he was overseas. Seemed a bit excessive over a sun lounger in Portugal.

I actually quite admire the Germans. When I was in Munich I asked about gaining German citizenship. I asked the border control officer if there was any criteria for getting a German passport. He said 'So long as your skin colour doesn't feature on our flag you'll be OK.'

@Dudeson

You tee'd me up for that and I was VERY VERY KIND.

I didn't even mention any of the 'H' words or either of the 'W's.

How many Zimbabwean Zebras does it take to make mixian?

How about locking up this thread?

@Green Goblin

But we were all having a good time.

what.s wrong with your jokes....? do you really need somebody to walk you through that?

oh boy, i do feel sorry for.
if you really think that bashing germany or VW will make even raise an eyebrow?
oh yeah, and for sure did the border police said that, when he checked your make believe passport made of rainbow powder and unicorn kisses, arriving on a firespitting dragon, farting goldcoins of ignorance and stupidity.

my only comment is,germany is safer than China, on the road and off the road!
and people give a crap about others.

what i love most is, when (many)chinese people,talk dream and drool how germans stick to the rules, and have things working out for them,even when times are rough, as hey literally simultaniously; cut people off, ignore right of way, don.t care about others, just throw trash away, spit, smoke at the presence of infants, argue and fight.

...i can only answer"I have no idea why places like Germany,Singapore,HK have it all figured out, we are probably so stupid that we follow some rules even though, they keep us safe and sound, i am sorry ...i feel ashamed for my country!"
...you should check the faces of the people around when i say that.
actually sometimes people enjoy a foreigner apologizing so much, they totally go for it and start ranting. usually i don.t curse them, or call my friends for a group beating. and just enjoy the show. lol

if you have only unfounded rants, then you should consider just not saying anything.

@Dudeson

Of course he didn't say that. IT.. WAS.. A.. JOKE!

I think that proved one of my points.

Now go and look up what rant means and then attribute it appropriately to one of us.

that is the proble napoleon.
if people have a terrible sense of humor e.g. wife beating jokes. then,you never now.
also when people have to actually confirm making a joke, they should leave the funny parts to someone else....

and that is conedy advise from a german...think about that for a minute.

that.s how bad the situation is..lol

if you gotta tell people it was a joke it was coz you neeeded to explain it was supposed to be funny

I just got here but it doesn't feel dangerous at all.

Then again, I am a 6'1" male who weighs over 200 pounds so I'm not easily frightened.

i am not easily frightened, either. but rest assured you will never be attacked by one person.
or at least not a single person, without a (deadly) weapon.
unless one is a super ninja, chances are slim, to get out of it without getting a little bit of a beating.

all of the attacks on my have been afternoon to evening. only one has happened at a bar/diner around dinner time.

beijing:
at nanluguoxiang 2 times (different sections)
around and inside our residence
outside a bbq restaurant
at a diner

kunming
nanpingjie
our residence parking
verbal attacks and threats at zhengyifan
my dad and wife being threatened at renmin zhonglu....in china's defense it was at a japan hate ralley. we needed to cross the road. and even me having, a free give away china flag, didn.t help.

so it.s very random. also there are hate and foreigner bashing groups, online. mostly in tier 1 cities. meeting up on weekends to "TALK TO FOREIGN DEVILS"

believe me it.s not very informative talk.